1984 – Born in Washington DC
1985 – Moved to Germany so my dad could be James Bond
1992 – Had a dream
1993 – Swallowed a very large magnet that may very well still be inside me
1995 – Lived with my family (including our dog, which was half coyote) in a motel for several weeks
1997 – Got a smile from the girl I liked as my classmates tried to stuff me into a garbage can
1998 – Sat in a garbage can at the request of a beautiful girl (not the same one from the previous year)
2000 – Survived the Y2K bug, bought a PS2, and started dating that girl who I sat in a garbage can for (big year for me)
2003 – Decided I was tired of looking like a girl and shaved my head
2005 – Drank 1.5 liters of milk nearly every day for several months and sang karaoke for the first time
2006 – Skipped class with my girlfriend to elope and then got a job in Japan
2010 – Spent a snowy New Year’s Eve with my wife and the cast of a Japanese feature film in an old Japanese home that had once been a hospital
2011 – Started sleeping with a baby on my chest every chance I could get
2013 – Worked an average of two days per week and performed a musical in ass-less chaps
2014 – Started carrying business cards and played a whole lot of board games
2015 – Potentially the biggest year of my life, second to 1993

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